


our hearts are connected (under the same sky)

by stylinshaw



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Radio, Fluff, Insomnia, Light Angst, M/M, Misunderstandings, allusions to norenmin lol
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-27
Updated: 2019-04-27
Packaged: 2020-02-07 09:34:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 12,108
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18617923
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/stylinshaw/pseuds/stylinshaw
Summary: Resident insomniac songwriter Mark Lee finds two things that help him fall asleep. The first is listening to Haechan, one of the hosts of NCT Standard FM's nightly radio showSun & Moon.The second is Lee Donghyuck.





	our hearts are connected (under the same sky)

**Author's Note:**

> I'm not kidding when I say that the only reason I was able to finish writing this fic in a week was because I PLANNED an outline for it lmao. tfw ur essay writing skills from school come in handy !
> 
> title is from the nct 127 song sun&moon! B)
> 
> Disclaimer: This is purely fictional! Also, my portrayal of insomnia/sleeplessness is only based on my perception of it, and it could be experienced differently by different people!

Fatigue weighs Mark’s eyelids down. The clock reads _01:47._

Maybe tonight is the night that he can get more than two proper hours of sleep in a night, he thinks to himself, as he draws his duvet over his body. Even as he closes his eyes, he knows that there’s no way that’s going to happen.

Some time passes. Mark doesn’t know how long, exactly. Sometimes it’ll be twenty seconds. Sometimes it’ll be an hour. He turns on his side. Clutches at the dumb Ryan plushie that Jaemin had gotten him for his birthday. Throws the plushie off his bed. Flips his pillow over, so that his head can rest on the colder side. Lies still until the pillow becomes too warm once more, before huffing and throwing the covers off himself.

He feels tears prick at the corners of his eyes. He’s _tired._ He wants to _sleep._ But for whatever reason, he can’t. Sighing, he drags himself over to his desk, settling himself into his chair before opening his drawer and taking out his lyric book.

The notebook itself is pretty battered. There’s a coffee stain on the cover from six months ago. There are pages ripped out haphazardly from when Mark would get too frustrated and tear his lyrics out. But it means the world to Mark, to have a diary of his thoughts and feelings laid out in front of him.

He turns to a blank page, and picks up a pen. His mind remains devoid of any actual information, choosing to go _sleep sleep sleep_ at him instead. He looks at the clock again. _02:08._

“Maybe listening to the radio will help me come up with something,” he mumbles to himself as he grabs his phone, plugging in his earphones and opening the radio application. He cycles through the stations, trying to find something he doesn’t mind listening to. He ends up stopping at a station playing some Chinese song that he vaguely recognises solely because Renjun has been playing it repeatedly for weeks. He lets the music wash over him as he picks up his pen once more, doodling aimlessly on a blank page in his notebook.

“And that was _Dream Launch,_  by Weishen V!” the radio host says cheerily, once the song comes to an end. “Some people call them WayV, but I think it sounds kind of dumb. Anyway, welcome back to _Sun & Moon, _ your go-to radio show for when you need something to listen to in the depths of the night. I’m your host Haechan, also known as _Full Sun,_  also known as the ‘Sun’ in _Sun & Moon. _My co-host, my Moon Taeil hyung, isn’t here with us tonight, but not to worry, he’ll be back before you know it!”

Whoever this guy is, he sure talks a whole fucking lot, Mark thinks to himself, as he continues to listen to Haechan ramble about music and life in general. The guy actually has a pretty nice voice, emotive and soft. Surprisingly, Mark finds his eyelids drooping after a while, as Haechan alternates between talking and playing music. It’s actually sort of nice, in a way, despite the fact that the only reason he’s listening to the show is because he can’t fall asleep.

The clock reads _03.55_ when a song entitled _Baby Don’t Like It_ stops.

“Well, my dear listeners, that was the last song for the night,” Haechan says. Mark feels disappointment churn in his heart inexplicably. “We have five minutes left, so I think it’s time I sing you guys a song!”

Mark quirks an eyebrow, confused, as an automated voice proclaims ' _LIVE MUSIC ON SUN & MOON!' _dramatically, through his earphones.

“Taeil hyung isn’t here to duet with me tonight, but I’m sure I’ll do fine on my own,” Haechan says pleasantly. There’s the faint strumming of a guitar in the background, and Mark wonders absently if Haechan knows how to play.

“Well, thank you for tuning in tonight, listeners! Remember, I’m here Monday through Friday, two to four in the morning,” Haechan chirps. “I’ll see you guys tomorrow, and for now, I’m going to be covering a classic crowd favourite- here’s _Replay_ by SHINee-sunbaenims!” The sound of the guitar starts up again, louder and more insistent in nature.

Mark honestly doesn’t know what he had been expecting, but it certainly was _not_ a voice that seemed to embody sunshine, laughter, and all good things in the world. Haechan’s voice is melodious and lilting as it flows through Mark’s earphones, and Mark suddenly finds himself filled with inspiration. Haechan finishes his song with a soft word of thanks, and suddenly, the show is over, with the voice of a different radio announcer filling Mark’s ears. He rips his earphones out immediately, picking his pen up and opening his notebook.

 _When my moon rises, your sun rises as well,_ he writes down. He manages to get out a couple more lines onto his page before he stops.

He titles the song _Sun & Moon. _

 

“You look tired.”

Mark cocks an eyebrow at Renjun. “What makes you say that?” he asks, sarcastically. They both know that Mark’s got dark circles the size of the grand canyon below his eyes. It’s not like it’s an uncommon occurrence, either- this conversation is practically routine for them at this point.

“Hyung, please, you never get enough sleep,” Renjun says, worry colouring his tone. “Are you sure you don’t want to see anyone about this?”

“No, Injunnie,” Mark sighs. “I really don’t. And anyway,” he pauses, thinking back to Haechan’s sweet voice going _replay, replay, replay…_ “I think I might have found something that can help.”

“Really?” Renjun’s eyes sparkle. “I’m glad to hear that, hyung. We’re all concerned about you, you know. Please come to us if you ever feel like it.”

Mark’s heart swells with affection and he ruffles Renjun’s hair fondly, pulling the younger boy into a quick hug. “I will,” he promises. They sit there in a comfortable silence for a while, before Renjun speaks up once more.

“Jaemin’s bringing his friend over today.”

“Jaemin has friends?” Mark jokes.

Renjun huffs out a laugh. “Yeah, this is apparently someone he met while on vacation in Jeju. He goes to Yonsei.” Yonsei is only around half an hour from Mark, Jaemin and Renjun’s own university, Korea University, so he supposes it makes sense as to why Jaemin can bring this mysterious friend of his over in the middle of the college week.

“That’s cool,” Mark hums. “Any idea when they’re coming?”

“Today evening, I think,” Renjun replies. “I’m not too sure, though.”

Mark nods. The rest of the day proceeds to blend into one, and before he knows it, it’s nearing seven in the evening and the sun is beginning to set.

They’re both in Mark’s room when there’s a knock on the door. Renjun, being closer to it, gets up, calling _‘Who is it?’_ as he goes.

“It’s me!” a voice that is unmistakably Jaemin’s calls back. Mark suddenly remembers that Jaemin is bringing his friend over and eyes the interior of his room suspiciously. It isn’t _too_ messy, he supposes, so he settles on fixing his hair and making himself look more presentable as Renjun opens the door instead. Jaemin bounces in cheerily, with a shorter boy following in his footsteps awkwardly.

“Injunnie, my love,” Jaemin presses an obnoxiously loud kiss to Renjun’s cheek. “I’ve missed you."

“We saw each other last night, but whatever, I guess,” Renjun rolls his eyes, looking unbothered to the untrained eye. But Mark can see the tiny, pleased smile forming at the corners of his lips. “Introduce your friend to us, Nana.”

“Right! This is Donghyuck. Donghyuck, this is Renjun, and that’s Mark over there.” Mark gets off his chair in order to walk over to Donghyuck to greet him properly. The boy is around the same height as Mark himself, with curly brown hair and skin seemingly tinted with gold. His eyes seem to sparkle as he bows, greeting them with a soft _“Hello, I’m Donghyuck.”_ He’s beautiful. Mark shakes the thought from his head as he shakes Donghyuck’s hand firmly.

“I’m Mark,” he says simply, and the words are swept away as Jaemin begins chattering. But it’s okay, because Donghyuck sends him a small smile before he turns away.

 

On the night of first day Mark properly hangs out with Donghyuck, one-on-one, he sleeps for ten hours straight.

He wakes up at ten in the morning to an incessant pounding on his door. His textbooks are left opened and untouched on his desk, and his phone is lying beneath his pillow, uncharged. He’s done nothing he’d been meaning to do throughout the night, because _he’d been sleeping through it_.

The knocking on his door gets louder and faster. “I’m coming!” he calls, as he rolls off his bed and walks over to the door. He hasn’t felt this rested and healthy in _ages._ It’s a feeling he wouldn’t mind getting used to.

“Fucking _finally._ Yukhei was asking about why you weren’t in Economics with him and you weren’t answering your phone, so I got kind of worried,” It’s Renjun, looking mildly frazzled as the words flow rapidly from his mouth. “What were you doing that- wait, were you...asleep?”

Mark smiles at the thought of having that normalcy in his life, the oh-so-straightforward experience of _sleeping in_ and _waking up late._ “Yeah, I’ve been asleep since around midnight, actually,” he says quietly. Renjun is silent for a moment, before an ear-splitting grin overtakes his features.

“Mark hyung,” he breathes. He steps forward into the room, flinging his arms around Mark in an almost-suffocating hug. “I’m so fucking happy for you. How were you able to fall asleep?”

“Um,” Mark feels a blush rising to his cheeks, and he’s thankful that Renjun can’t see it. “I’m not quite sure, yet.” A memory surfaces in his mind, one from last night.

 

**12 hours prior**

“I’m glad Jaemin ditched us, you know. It was fun hanging out with you alone,” Donghyuck says as they walk towards the bus stop. It was supposed to be him, Donghyuck and Jaemin going for dinner, and long after Mark and Donghyuck had reached the restaurant and ordered their food, Jaemin had texted them with a _sorry guys can’t make it tonight :(._ Mark and Donghyuck had decided to make the best of the night anyway, and it was quickly turning out to have been one of Mark’s better decisions.

“I had a lot of fun as well,” Mark replies sincerely. His voice is muffled by the sound of his scarf. “We should hang out again sometime.”

“Definitely,” Donghyuck nods, as they take their seats at the bus stand. There’s a lull in the conversation, before he lets out a throaty yawn. “Wow, I’m really tired. I can’t wait to go back and crash.”

Mark nods. “I wish I could do that,” he says, tone only half-joking. Donghyuck cocks an eyebrow.

“What do you mean?”

“It takes me like, six hours to fall asleep every night.” Of course, Mark is downplaying the truth behind his words by feigning a tone of exaggeration and humour, but it feels nice to talk about it candidly for once.

“Like insomnia?” Donghyuck’s eyes are wide. Mark winces internally at the words- he doesn’t like hearing the word _insomnia._ It sounds harsh, reminds Mark that this is something that is inexplicably out of his control.

“Maybe something like that,” is what he says out loud. “But it’s okay, it helps me to stay on top of my work and songwriting.”

Their bus pulls up just then, with the numbers _156_ blinking on the front, too bright for the cold night. They bundle on together, moving towards the empty back rows.

“You write songs?” Donghyuck asks curiously.

“They aren’t very good, though,” Mark hastens to answer. “All I do is write lyrics and rap them on occasion. I’m not the best at singing.”

“Shut up, I’ve only known you for a couple of days now and I already know you’re amazing at everything you do,” Donghyuck says in retaliation. Mark directs his focus into pretending he isn’t affected by the words, attempting to seem outwardly calm. “And hey, if you ever need a singing voice for your songs, let me know. I might be able to help you.”

“You sing?” Mark questions. As if Donghyuck couldn’t get any more endearing.

“A little,” Donghyuck smiles softly. The bus begins to slow down. “Well, hyung, this is me.”

“Okay, Hyuck,” Mark says. “I’ll see you soon?”

Donghyuck pauses, seemingly in deep thought about something, before he darts forward and presses his lips against the highest point of Mark’s cheekbone. “Of course, hyung,” he whispers. “Sleep well, okay?”

Mark watches, shell-shocked, as Donghyuck exits the bus. His cheek seems to tingle throughout the journey home.

 _Sleep well,_ Donghyuck had said. Mark turns the words over in his head barely an hour later, as he lies awake beneath his bed covers. He brings his fingertips up, touches the spot on his cheek where Donghyuck had kissed him.

He doesn’t have trouble falling asleep after that.

 

**present**

Falling into whatever he has with Donghyuck is easy afterwards. The cheek kiss had been one thing, except for some reason, Donghyuck never does it again. He doesn’t even mention it, nor does he give any indication of having even remembered it. So naturally, Mark follows his lead and pretends that that one fateful kiss on the cheek had never even occurred.

And anyway, whether kissing is involved or not, Donghyuck is an incredible friend. At the risk of sounding sappy and dramatic, Mark feels more complete than he has in a long time with Donghyuck at his side.

“You and Donghyuck seem to be,” Renjun pauses for way longer than necessary. _“Getting along.”_

“Of course we’re getting along, Injunnie, that’s what _friends_ do,” Mark replies waspishly. He makes no attempt to mention the kiss, the romantic tension he had felt in the air as Donghyuck had alighted from the bus.

“You don’t have hearts in your eyes when you’re talking about your other ‘friends’,” Renjun replies, forming air quotes with his fingers. “Why don’t you just ask him out?”

Mark bristles. “Just drop it, okay?”

Renjun blinks in surprise before nodding reluctantly, before settling back against Mark’s couch cushions. “It’s twelve thirty,” he mumbles, checking on his phone before pocketing the device. “How have you been sleeping lately?”

“I’m sleeping okay.” In reality, Mark hasn’t experienced a single full night of sleep since that one night, but he _is_ clocking better hours now. If he’s lucky, maybe he’ll hit six hours for the night before having to wake up to study and get ready for class. But he isn’t that lucky, not often.

“I’m glad your sleep schedule is improving,” Renjun’s eyes are closed. “Anyway, just let me crash here, I’ll leave by myself when I wake up…”

“Renjun?” Upon closer inspection, the younger boy is fast asleep. Oh, how Mark envies him. He grabs a spare blanket and drapes it over his friend before heading to his desk, hoping that he can tire himself out by completing some course readings.

 

His hopes had been quickly and immediately dashed the moment he had opened an online copy of a research paper on the phenomenon of entrepreneurship, with the paper being somehow _so_ content heavy and tiring to read that he had actually become even more alert after finishing it, desperate to do something interesting. He glances at the clock. _02:08._ The number seems kind of familiar, and he searches his brain in an effort to remember why.

 _The radio show,_ his brain proclaims. _Sun & Moon from two to four in the morning. _Mark is already reaching out for his phones and his shitty earphones, shoving them into his ears as he taps on his radio application.

“Haechannie, what do you think about Chen’s new release?” An unfamiliar voice says. Evidently, Mark has tuned in in the middle of an ongoing conversation.

“I adore EXO-sunbaenims, and Chen-sunbaenim’s solo was incredible!” Now _this_ voice, Mark recognises. He lets Haechan’s honey voice drip over him, relaxing into his chair as the conversation continues. After a couple of minutes, Mark is able to infer that the unfamilar voice, the one that he had heard earlier, belonged to the co-host who had been missing previously, Moon Taeil. The pair has an easy, effortless banter, and Mark finds his eyelids drooping once more, almost ready to propel him to sleep.

Almost.

No matter how hard he tries, Mark still can’t convince his mind or body to fall asleep. He ends up writing fragments of lyrics in the margins of one of his textbooks as Haechan and Taeil continue with the show, playing a mix of soft and energetic songs to fill the gaps in between their conversations.

“Well, listeners,” Taeil says, after a while. “It’s now ten to four, so what do you say we wrap up with a song, Haechannie?”

Mark perks up. He had completely forgotten that Haechan would be singing at the end of the show, and he instantly feels more energised. He hears the sounds of an acoustic guitar in the background once more, and makes a mental note to work on his own playing skills at some point.

“We will be singing an original song tonight,” Haechan says, and Mark raises his eyebrows, curiousity piqued. “This is a song that Taeil hyung wrote, it’s entitled _No Longer._  Please enjoy!”

As it turns out, Taeil’s singing voice is incredible- even better than Haechan’s, in terms of technique and execution, if Mark is being honest. But while Taeil’s voice is amazing, it doesn’t make Mark feel the way Haechan’s does. The song itself is good, the blend of their voices calming to listen to.

 _You and I; We are like one,_ Mark writes down in his notebook. The song draws to an end, as does the show. The sudden silence of his room as Mark unplugs his earphones is almost stifling, reminding him of the fact that he’s completely alone, unable to rest. He can hear Renjun’s soft snuffling through his closed bedroom door, a sign of him being in a deep sleep.

His phone vibrates just then, lighting up to signal the arrival of a new text message.

**Lee Donghyuck 04:07**

mark help im bored

**Mark Lee 04:07**

Donghyuck, why are you awake?

**Lee Donghyuck 04:09**

im going home

**Mark Lee 04:10**

Going home from where? Haha

**Lee Donghyuck 04:10**

can u stop with the fucking Hahas

also why are YOU awake??

**Mark Lee 04:11**

You know sleeping and I don’t mix well, Hyuck.

Donghyuck’s texts stop coming after that, so Mark sighs and tosses his phone on the bed, before crawling under the covers. He tries closing his eyes. Nothing. He isn’t keeping track of the how long he’s been awake, and he startles when his phone buzzes.

**Lee Donghyuck 04:37**

open ur door

**Mark Lee 04:37**

???

He gets up, exiting his room and tiptoeing past Renjun, who is tangled in his blanket, face buried in the couch cushions. Sure enough, when he cracks the door open, Donghyuck is there.

“Hey, hyung,” he smiles. “Fancy some company? Since you said you couldn’t sleep.”

Mark stares for a second, nonplussed. Trust Donghyuck, wonderful, kind Donghyuck, to show up at his place in the middle of the night just because Mark isn’t able to sleep properly. Nodding slowly, he opens the door and lets the younger boy in.

“Is that Renjun?” Donghyuck asks curiously, peering over at the lump of pillows and blankets that Renjun has molded himself into.

“Yes it is,” Mark replies. “He came over and fell asleep, so I figured I’d leave him there.” Mark leads the way to his bedroom, opening the door and allowing Donghyuck to enter.

“So, where are you coming from?” Mark questions, as he seats himself on the edge of his bed. Donghyuck behaves less politely, choosing to sprawl across the bed instead.

“Work,” Donghyuck says absently. Mark scrunches up his nose, confused.

“Work?” he parrots. “You mean you get off work this late?”

“Yep, I’m used to it by now,” Donghyuck says nonchalantly.

“What do you do?”

“Well, I work at a- hang on,” Donghyuck’s eyes narrow. “I came here to make you fall asleep, don’t distract me with conversation.”

“Hey, you’re the one who said you’re here to give me company,” Mark retorts, but his heart feels warm as Donghyuck forces him into a lying position.

“I’ve been told that I have a very calming presence-” Mark snorts, because he wouldn’t exactly associate the words _Donghyuck_ and _calming_ with one another. “-hey, it’s true! You just haven’t seen that side of me yet. Anyway,” Donghyuck reaches over and flicks Mark’s light switch, plunging them into complete darkness, broken only by the sliver of moonlight that filters through the crack in the curtains. Mark brings his covers over his body tentatively, and closes his eyes. He feels so tired, yet so awake at the same time.

“Mark hyung?” Donghyuck’s voice is quiet, enhanced by the blackness of the night.

“Yeah?”

“Do you know why you can’t sleep?”

“Not really,” Mark sighs.”It’s been going on for a while now, and I’ve never been able to stop it.”

Donghyuck doesn’t respond, but he does reach out blindly, hand fumbling in the dark for a few moments before landing on top of Mark’s head. His fingers begin carding through his hair gently. “Is this okay?” he questions softly. Mark makes a quiet noise of assent.

“I wish I could help you somehow,” he murmurs. Mark wants to say _you’re helping right now,_ but all he really has the energy to do is to lean into Donghyuck’s touch, like a cat that’s been starved of attention. His eyes close of their own accord.

“Mark hyung?” Mark thinks he hears Donghyuck say. He thinks of responding, but having _achievable sleep_ within his grasp is too tempting, and he finally falls asleep, thinking of how maybe Donghyuck’s presence was _kind of_ calming after all.

 

“You know, you told me your sleep schedule was improving,” Renjun begins, looking far too smug for the time of the day that it is. “But you never told me _why.”_

Mark had woken up late in the morning, alone in bed but with a text on his phone from Donghyuck, reading _I had to go for class, but I hope you rested well!_ He had, in fact, rested _extremely_ well, heading to class with a literal pep in his step. Renjun had been the only one out of his friends who wasn’t completely baffled by Mark’s unusually energetic disposition, and Mark thinks he knows why.

“So I wake up today morning,” Renjun continues. “It’s around eight in the morning, I’m trying to fix my hair as I get off the couch, and who do I see, as soon as I look up?”

Mark rolls his eyes.

 _“Lee Donghyuck,”_ Renjun says, in a completely unnecessary stage whisper. “He was heading out, talking to someone on the phone about being late for class. And all he did when he saw me was wave before leaving, like him being there was a _normal occurrence_. So I head to your room, wanting to ask you about this incident, and what do I see? I see you buried in your duvet, _fast-fucking-asleep.”_ He punctuates each word with a hard jab at Mark’s chest. “So tell me, hyung, why was Donghyuck over last night?” he smiles, a little too sweetly.

“It was nothing, Injunnie,” Mark replies. “I wasn’t able to sleep, Donghyuck happened to text me while I was awake, he came over to keep me company and somehow, he managed to make me fall asleep.”

Renjun pouts. “That isn’t as entertaining as what I had assumed was happening,” he says sullenly.

Mark narrows his eyes. “What did you assume was happening?”

“Uh, never mind that,” Renjun says shiftily. Mark drops the topic- he doesn’t really want to know. “So, is this going to be a regular thing?”

Mark frowns. “I don’t know.”

 

His question is answered later that evening, when there’s a knock on his door. Mark sets aside the ramen that he was getting ready to eat, pulling the door open.

“Hi, hyung!” Donghyuck stands in the doorway, wrapped in his bulky winter coat. His cheeks are flushed and his hair is mussed across his forehead adorably.

“Donghyuck,” Mark says, surprised. “What are you doing here?”

“Well, it’s,” Donghyuck checks his phone. “Close to eleven now, so I thought I’d come over and help you go to bed before I head to work.”

Mark feels his cheeks colour rapidly. “Hyuck, I don’t need you to do this for me every night,” he mumbles, embarrassed. “I’m really thankful for how you helped me last night, but really, I’ll be fine on my own.” His face grows hotter and hotter as he speaks- he knows he probably looks like a tomato at this point.

Donghyuck scoffs, waving a dismissive hand at him. “Hyung, you’ve constantly looked tired for as long as I’ve known you,” he says, and there’s a hint of concern in his tone. “And from what you said last night, this has been going on for a lot longer than we’ve known each other. If I can help you, why wouldn’t I?”

Mark feels his throat closing at the unfiltered kindness his friend is showing him. He nods curtly, stepping aside so Donghyuck can enter.

“Thank you, Hyuck,” he manages to say, as Donghyuck unzips his coat and hangs it up neatly. “Uh, when and where do you have to go for work?”

“Oh, I think I’ll leave after one, and I work at- wait, is that ramen?” Donghyuck eyes the bowl hungrily. Mark is pretty much powerless to stop him after that, watching with a mix of fondness and exasperation (as he often tends to feel around Donghyuck) as the younger boy plops himself onto the couch and begins helping himself to the noodles.

“Oh, sorry,” Donghyuck says, after a minute or so. “Did you want some?”

“Well, it _is_ my ramen, so yes, I do want some,” Mark says, mock-seriously. Donghyuck pats the seat beside him, and Mark sits down gingerly.

“Open up,” Mark obliges unthinkingly, opening his mouth so Donghyuck can feed him the ramen. The domesticity and comfort of the scene only strikes him once he’s chewing the noodles, with him sitting cross legged, body facing towards Donghyuck, who cradles the bowl in his hands. They finish the noodles in a similar fashion, settling back against the couch once they’re done.

Mark is confused- he’s never felt this comfortable with anyone, and certainly not this quickly. He doesn’t have time to dwell on it, however, as Donghyuck begins to tug on his sleeve insistently.

“Come on, hyung, it’s time to go to bed,” he says, and Mark feels the embarrassment flare up in him once more.

“I’m just going to wash up first,” Mark says, and steps into his bathroom, where he proceeds to wash his face, brush his teeth, and get changed into his softest sleep shirt and cotton pajama pants. When he enters his room afterwards, he finds Donghyuck sitting on his bed, long legs extended in front of him with his phone in his hand.

“Aw, you look so soft,” Donghyuck smiles at him. “Get into bed, hyung.”

Mark slides under the covers, feeling Donghyuck’s fingers automatically tangle into his hair, as if they belonged there. There’s something about Donghyuck- Mark doesn’t know what exactly, it could be anything from his honeyed voice, to his tender touches, or his pleasant demeanor- whatever it is, it makes Mark feel relaxed, free from the stress of work and life. The lights go out.

“Um, Hyuck?” Mark says.

“Yeah?”

“Thank you,” he mumbles, and it’s the last thing he remembers saying before he drifts into a dreamless sleep.

 

Of course, it isn’t possible for Donghyuck to be over every single night, what with them being from different universities and all, but he makes an effort to stay over as often as he can. And miraculously, Mark’s body begins working again, even when Donghyuck isn’t there. It’s like the knowledge that he _has_ Donghyuck helps him rest easy, and he finds himself able to fall asleep even without Donghyuck occupying the other half of his bed. Of course, it’s not like he gets a full night of sleep each time- hell, he doesn’t even get full nights of sleep with Donghyuck himself, sometimes- but he’s definitely sleeping more than he used to, and Mark is happy with his progress.

There’s also the minor issue of Mark’s feelings for the younger boy.

“How do you feel when you look at Jaemin?” Mark asks Renjun one day. Renjun squints at him, as if he’s trying to decipher if Mark is being serious or not.

“Did Jaemin put you up to this? If he did, tell him I’m not breaking down my tsundere facade unless I’m forced to do so,” he responds. Mark is about to laugh at the joke until he realises that Renjun is, in fact, dead serious.

“Uh, he didn’t, actually,” he says awkwardly. “I just- you two are in love and it’s obvious, and I was wondering how you feel when you look at him.”

 _“Oh,”_ Renjun says, understandingly, looking a little like he knows something Mark doesn’t. “Well, love can manifest itself in many kinds of ways, and it shows differently in different types of people.”

Mark nods. Renjun continues, expression turning soft as he speaks. “For me, when I see Jaemin, I feel a little more complete,” he says. Mark unconsciously begins thinking of Donghyuck. “He makes me want to do things just to keep him around, just to see him smile.”

Well, if love manifests itself in many types of ways, it must have presented itself in the exact same way in both Renjun as well as Mark, because with every word Renjun utters, all Mark can think of is _Donghyuck, Donghyuck, Donghyuck._

“You should tell him, you know.”

“What?” Mark looks up, eyes wide. “This isn’t about me, I’m talking about you and Jaemin.”

“I know you are, hyung,” Renjun laughs. “But I’m sure you yourself know why you asked me about this. Donghyuck’s not going to be waiting around for your confession forever- you should ask him out soon.”

Mark sighs in defeat, shoulders slumping. “I don’t think he’ll feel the same way.”

“You’ll never know if you don’t try, right?”

Renjun’s words stick with Mark long after he’s left, even when Mark is lying alone in bed, staring at the ceiling as he tries to fall asleep. He glances at his phone aimlessly. _02:08._ He sits up abruptly, grabbing his earphones and plugging them in as he opens the radio application.

“Haechan, how do you think we should fill our time tonight?” It’s Taeil’s voice Mark hears first, exactly the same as it had sounded previously.

“Well, hyung,” Haechan’s smooth voice flows into Mark’s ears, and he finds himself relaxing unconsciously. “How about we take some listener calls? This is our chance to talk to the lost souls of the night, see what they’re doing up at this hour. Listeners, if you’re interested in calling and having a chat about anything and everything for a couple of minutes with us, please dial this number…” Mark takes note of the number, even if he isn’t going to call them. It’s not like he has anything to say to Haechan or Taeil, anyway-

-or does he? Mark thinks back to his dilemma from earlier, about confessing to Donghyuck, and wonders if having Haechan’s perspective and advice will provide him with motivation. Haechan and Taeil are talking to someone on air, their effortless banter transitioning into the phone call.

Mark opens the phone application and dials.

“Hello, this is Yuta speaking from NCT Standard FM,” a bored voice says upon pickup.

Mark swallows. “Um, hello, I’m calling for the _Sun & Moon _radio show,” he says.

“Listener calls, right?” Yuta questions. Mark nods, before remembering that this is a phone call and that Yuta cannot see him, and delivers a rushed _‘Yes!’_ to his phone.

“Alright, can I get your name?”

“Mark,” Mark says, before immediately wondering if he should have given a fake name instead. In any case, Mark is a common enough name, he supposes.

“Okay, Mark, just hold on,” Yuta says. “I’ll be able to redirect your call to our show hosts once they finish talking to their current caller.”

Mark hums in affirmation and waits until the line crackles to life again, and all of a sudden, he can hear Haechan’s voice.

“Here’s our next caller!” Haechan says cheerily. “Hi, how are you? What’s your name?”

“Hi, I’m good, thank you,” Mark says, not quite believing that he’s having a conversation with one of the loveliest voices he’s ever heard. “My name is Mark. I’m a big fan of your show.”

Someone chokes. Mark’s not quite sure who it is, but someone is _definitely_ coughing and choking on the _Sun & Moon _set.

“Thanks for calling, Mark!” It’s Taeil this time, sounding, well. _Fine,_ which leads Mark to believe that Haechan is choking at the sound of his name, for whatever reason. “Do you have anything to share for today?”

“Actually, I was hoping on getting some advice from you guys,” Mark says awkwardly. This is it. “There’s this guy I’m really into, and I’m not sure if I should tell him I like him, because I don’t think he feels the same way.”

“Ooh, a classic pining situation,” Taeil muses. “What makes you think he doesn’t like you back?”

“Well, he’ll send mixed signals, sometimes,” Mark says, thinking back to that one kiss on that one bus ride. “But for the most part, it just seems like he sees me as a friend.”

“Well, you’ll never know if you don’t try,” Mark wrinkles his nose at Taeil’s words. What is it with that statement? He feels like he’s heard it a dozen times today. “Uh, Haechan, do you have any advice to offer?”

When Haechan begins talking, he sounds...different. Mark can’t quite put his finger on why- but he no longer sounds as cheery as he did at the beginning of the show, voice subdued and quiet.

“Um, I think you should go for it,” he says. His voice sounds hoarse. “I’ve experienced this...pining sensation as well, and I think if you confess, you won’t feel like you’re in the dark any longer. Even if he doesn’t feel the same way, at least you know, right?”

It makes sense to Mark, even if Haechan _does_ sound like he’s going to cry saying it, for some reason. Perhaps Mark has hit a nerve. He winces, sending out a silent apology to Haechan.

“I think I’ll go for it soon, then,” Mark breathes out. As he’d expected, he _does_ feel more motivated, now that he’s had three people tell him to just go for it. “Thank you so much, guys. This really helped.”

“No problem!” Taeil and Haechan chorus in scarily synchronised unison. The call cuts off, and Mark is left listening to a dial tone. He’s filled with a renewed vigor, and he decides that he’ll confess to Donghyuck the next day.

It’s still not easy to fall asleep, but for once, he doesn’t really mind. He has things to think about, anyway.

 

**Mark Lee 09:30**

Hey Hyuck! Want to meet today? I have two lectures for today haha, but if you’re free when I’m done we should hang out haha

****Mark Lee** 12:04**

Done with my first lecture letsgetit!

****Mark Lee** 13:26**

Hey, where have you disappeared to haha, it’s already lunchtime and I still haven’t heard from you

****Mark Lee** 16:45**

Done with lecture two, but I’m guessing you won’t be able to meet today?

****Mark Lee** 20:09**

Hyuck?

 

_(seen)_

“What do you mean, he’s ignoring you?” Renjun repeats, from the other end of the phone line. “What did you do, Mark hyung?”

“I didn’t do anything!” Mark snaps back. “All I did was ask him if he wanted to hang out today, and I was planning on asking him out when we met. I’ve been texting him throughout the day and he’s read all the messages, but he hasn’t sent me a single reply.”

Renjun makes a noise of confusion. _Same,_ Mark thinks. “Maybe he has some personal problems going on?” he suggests. Mark considers the idea. It’s not implausible- perhaps Donghyuck _had_ run into some kind of problem with work, or in his personal life. It’s only fair of Mark to give him the benefit of the doubt, rather than getting needlessly worked up immediately.

“I guess I’ll wait for tomorrow, then,” Mark says. “Thanks, Injunnie.”

“Hope it works out, hyung,” Renjun says, before hanging up. Mark drags himself over to his textbooks- it feels like more of a chore now, probably because he hasn’t talked to Donghyuck all day. Usually, talking to Donghyuck energises him, makes him feel happy and clear-headed, ready to take on whatever challenges the world throws at him during the day.

Today, however, he’s feeling kind of drained. However, work stops for no one, and he manages to read one of his more interesting textbooks for around to two hours before deciding to head to bed. Before he knows it, it’s almost two, and he’s listening to the radio again, wide awake. He’s managed to tune in before _Sun & Moon _ begins, and he’s surprised when the show starts and Taeil’s is the only voice he hears.

“Hello, listeners,” Taeil says cheerily. “You’re listening to _Sun & Moon, _ your number one late night radio show. I’m your host Moon Taeil, better known as the ‘moon’ in _Sun & Moon. _Unfortunately, our Full Sun isn’t here today, he’s feeling a little under the weather. Not to worry, he’ll return in no time!” Taeil continues chattering as Mark’s heart sinks. Is this some kind of omen? First Donghyuck ignoring him the entire day, and it just so happens to be on the same day Haechan falls ill? He hopes he isn’t cursed, or something.

He tries to listen to the show as per usual, but it’s lacking something without Haechan’s voice there. Mark ends up turning his phone off barely twenty minutes into the broadcast, choosing to return to his previous activity of staring at the ceiling instead. Eventually, he’s able to force himself to fall asleep, but it’s by no means a restful one. He wakes up four hours later, feeling a lot worse than he has in a long time. There’s a notification for one text on his phone when he checks it.

**Huang Renjun 06:44**

I guess you and Hyuck have made up! He’s been posting on his Instagram story all night, he’s been clubbing ≧◡≦ There doesn’t seem to be anything going on with him.

**Mark Lee 07:15**

What?

Mark’s not really one for Instagram. Sure, he has an account, but it gets checked approximately once a week and posted on even less. He opens the app warily, and sure enough, Donghyuck’s been posting throughout the night on his story, from videos of club rooms with bright lights and loud music, to selfies of himself, eyes lined with liner and cheeks smeared with blush, getting cosy with some dude with an eye-smile. _Who even is this dude?_ Mark wonders, as he taps to view a video of Donghyuck wrapping his arm around eyesmile dude’s shoulders, smiling beatifically.

 _Well, Donghyuck certainly had fun last night_ , Mark thinks bitterly. Why was he ignoring Mark? What did he do? Mark tries to recall every interaction he’s had with Donghyuck in the last week, but nothing he’s done has seemed sketchy in any sort of way. The only explanation he can come up with, which is the one he ends up settling on, is the theory that Donghyuck has figured out about Mark’s feelings for him, and he finds it weird because he doesn’t feel the same way. It‘s a likely reason as to why he’d been avoiding Mark.

Mark feels the beginnings of a fatigue-induced headache forming at the corners of his brain. He needs to find Donghyuck, ensure that they can stay friends at the very least, because now that he’s gotten used to life _with_ Donghyuck, he’s not sure if he can revert back to where he was before when he hadn’t known the younger yet.

He thinks of texting Donghyuck, but he knows that he’ll probably get ignored again. Trying to contact him online won’t work- he’s going to have to find Donghyuck in person. He decides to try going over to Donghyuck’s after his classes end for the day.

What was it that Renjun and Taeil had said to him?

_You’ll never know if you don’t try._

 

“Hello,” It’s eyesmile dude, Mark can tell instantly- his features are distinct enough for him to remember. “How can I help you?”

“I’m here to see Donghyuck,” Mark starts, and eyesmile dude cuts him off.

“I assumed so, Mark,” he says, and Mark realises that the guy knows his name despite Mark having not introduced himself. “I’m not sure if Donghyuck wants to see you right now, actually,” He looks sympathetic, watching as Mark’s face falls.

“Jeno, who is it?” Mark startles- it’s Donghyuck, shouting from somewhere inside the house.

Jeno pauses, turning around to face the interior of the house. “It’s no one,” he calls back. Lowering his volume, he turns back. “Mark, Donghyuck’s going through some...emotional troubles, right now. He just needs a little space from everyone, you know. Just give him some time.”

“I thought he might have been going through something, and I was giving him the benefit of the doubt, until I went online and saw all of his pictures from your night spent clubbing,” Mark’s voice cracks, and if Jeno notices, he doesn’t bring it up. “I just want to know _why_ he’s ignoring me.”

“That’s not something for me to say,” Jeno smiles apologetically. “I’m really sorry, Mark.”

Mark sighs. “It’s fine,” he mutters. He’s really messed up- Donghyuck is properly weirded out by him, now, and Jeno’s just too nice to break the news to Mark. He bids Jeno a short farewell before turning on his heel and striding away, back to his own home. The walk to the bus stop from Donghyuck’s dorm building is short, but it seems to be miles longer because of the cold. Mark burrows his hands into the pockets of his coat, tilting his head down in an attempt to bear the wind.

By the time he gets home, he’s exhausted, cold, and hungry. There’s only one person he thinks to call.

 

“I can’t believe you’re interrupting my date night with my _baobei,”_ Jaemin says sulkily, as soon as Mark opens the door. “We were doing something important, you know.”

“No we weren’t. We were watching anime rereuns on the television,” Renjun deadpans, from behind Jaemin. “Nana’s just being a baby.” Jaemin huffs at Renjun, but doesn’t argue.

“Sorry, guys,” Mark sighs. “I’m just confused.”

“Yeah, I will say, a single text saying _Renjun help, Donghyuck hates me_ is not the most informative of messages,” Renjun says. “What’s wrong?”

“I went over to Donghyuck’s dorm, to ask him about why he’s been ignoring me, only to have his friend tell me that he doesn’t want to talk to me, and that I should go home,” Mark says. “The thing is, I don’t know _why,_ and Jeno refused to tell me as well, and I can’t fix this if I don’t know what I did.”

“Hold on, let me think about this,” Renjun says. He frowns in concentration.

From next to him, Jaemin starts to really make himself at _home_ on Mark’s couch. He’s got cushions behind him, in front of him, at his sides, you name it. “Hey, Mark hyung,” he says. “Did you say Jeno just now? Like Lee Jeno?”

“I don’t know his last name,” Mark says. “He smiles with his eyes, though.”

“What do you think of him?” Suddenly, Jaemin is a lot closer to Mark than he had been two seconds before. Mark steps back, raising his hands in defense.

“He seems fine, I guess?”

Jaemin retreats, clearly disappointed with Mark’s unemotive response. “Did you hear that, Injunnie? He’s insulting the love of our lives like this.”

“The what of your what now?” Mark doesn’t _particularly_ want to know, but his brain makes him ask, anyway.

“Ignore him, hyung,” Renjun rolls his eyes, but his cheeks are tinted pink, a telltale sign of embarrassment. “Anyway, I can’t think of any reason as to why Donghyuck would be acting like this.”

Mark waits for him to continue. He doesn’t.

“Well, that was nice talk,” Mark says, dryly. “Thanks for the help, Renjun.”

“Look, I know you think I know everything-” Renjun says primly.

“I don’t, actually-” Mark interjects.

“-but sometimes, even people of supreme intellect don’t know it all,” Renjun finishes loftily. Mark heaves a sigh. “Anyway, would you like to join Jaemin’s cushion fort with me?”

Mark eyes Jaemin, who is all but a single tuft of brown hair at this point, with the rest of him being covered by blankets, cushions, and now, Renjun.

“I think I’ll pass,” he says. “I’m going to head to my room, you guys can go whenever. Just close the door as you’re leaving.”

Renjun lets out a muffled “okay” upon hearing Mark’s words. Afterwards, it’s just Mark and his closed bedroom door. His mind drifts back to Donghyuck once more. He knows it’s dumb, but he really misses his friend. He misses hanging out with Donghyuck, sharing stories with Donghyuck, the feeling of Donghyuck’s fingers in his hair. It’s only been two days, but it’s felt a lot longer. Not for the first time, Mark wonders how Donghyuck had managed to worm himself into Mark’s heart so quickly and easily, filling in the gaps in his life perfectly.

And now Donghyuck’s left him, and the holes in Mark’s life are back, empty and endless.

He doesn’t sleep for a single minute that night.

 

“Sorry again,” Mark offers, mildly regretfully.

Renjun glares at him as Jaemin lays a cotton pad on the newly-formed wound on his knee, sticking it down with strips of medical tape. As it had turned out, Renjun and Jaemin had fallen asleep on Mark’s couch the previous night, and were still there when Mark decided to leave his room to get breakfast after a night of getting no sleep. Which was how Renjun had woken up at around six, only to be met with the sight of Mark staring back at him from the shadows of the room with bloodshot eyes. Renjun had screamed, fallen off the couch, and subsequently cut his knee open on the edge of Mark’s coffee table.

“What were you doing, standing in the middle of the room like some kind of zombie?” Renjun gripes. “At _six_ in the fucking morning too! It was like my own personal horror film simulator.”

“Sorry, Injunnie,” Mark scrubs a hand over his face, feeling tired to the bone. “I just...didn’t sleep last night.”

“You didn’t sleep for how long?” Renjun asks, tilting his head. Mark stays quiet. “Wait. You haven’t slept since the day before yesterday?”

“I guess you could put it that way,” Mark says.

“That’s not healthy, hyung,” Jaemin interjects. “Do you know what caused this?”

Mark pauses. “I think I do,” he says, finally. Renjun shoots him an indecipherable glance. “I’m fine though, don’t worry.”

“Yeah, that’s completely believable, hyung, thanks,” Jaemin snorts. “Why won’t you go to a doctor?” His voice holds worry, affection.

“It’s because I don’t want to become dependent on any form of sleeping medication,” Mark replies truthfully.

Jaemin purses his lips, looking annoyed. “Promise me you’ll go if you miss an entire night of sleep again,” he says firmly. Renjun stands besides him, arms crossed. Mark is beginning to feel kind of chastised.

“Fine,” he acquiesces. Renjun and Jaemin nod in sync, looking far too similar to a pair of self-satisfied parents for Mark’s liking. They bid their farewells soon afterwards, having lectures to attend. Mark ends up cleaning his apartment with the lack of anything better to do, managing to while his time away until he has to leave for Economics.

Upon arriving at the lecture hall, Mark slumps into his usual seat. The lights in the room seem bright, far brighter than they usually are. His eyes are stinging. He opens his bag and takes out the can of coffee that he’d purchased from a vending machine earlier, cracking it open and downing the entire thing in one gulp. It does nothing but make him feel ten times worse, but at least he isn’t at the brink of collapsing in class for the time being.

“Mark!” a familiar voice crows happily. Mark turns to see one of his class friends, Yukhei, bound up to him, excitement clearly visible on his features. “How are you?”

“I’m doing good, man. How are you?” Mark answers. He doesn’t notice how Yukhei’s eyes linger on his face, taking in his dark circles and red eyes, no doubt. His eyes slide to the empty can of coffee, and back to Mark’s face again.

Mercifully, he doesn’t bring it up. “I’m good too. Don’t really want to be here right now, though.”

Mark is about to reply when their professor walks in, and from then on, it’s time to shut up and listen. The thing is though, running on approximately four hours of sleep from _two nights ago,_ paired with copious amounts of caffeine, isn’t exactly doing wonders for Mark’s brain. The professor’s words flow into Mark’s ears like water and flow out just as smoothly, leaving nothing behind for him to remember. When class finally ends, Mark has a splitting migraine, no doubt an effect of the blinding fluorescent lights in the room. Seriously, when did they get so fucking bright?

“Bro,” Yukhei begins seriously, as he packs his things into his bag. “I didn’t want to bring this up earlier, but...you don’t look too good right now. I think you should go back and get some rest.”

Mark lets out what he hopes is a polite-sounding laugh, but he’s pretty sure it comes out more hysterical than not. “Yeah man, I think I will,” he says, standing up with his backpack held in one hand. “I’ve just got to...get home…” the world around him starts swaying, strangely enough. Is he hallucinating? Either way, it’s kind of nice, with the annoying lights blurring into a gentle, faded sort of beam that is much easier on Mark’s eyes.

“Mark? Mark!” Yukhei calls frantically. He’s dropped his things, running over to Mark’s side to hold him up as his knees begin to buckle.

“I’m fine, bro…” is the last thing Mark remembers saying, before everything goes black.

 

Mark wakes up feeling vaguely like he’s been on an acid trip of some sort. He’s in his own bed, the covers drawn around him tightly. The sun shines, even through the curtains drawn over his window. There’s a hand in his hair, scratching at his scalp gently.

Wait a second.

Mark shoots up, lighting fast, turning wildly to face whoever is at his bedside. Sure enough, Donghyuck stares back at him with wide, unblinking eyes.

“Donghyuck?” Mark chokes out. His voice is raspy from disuse.

Donghyuck snatches the hand that was in Mark’s hair back quickly, as if he’d been burned. “Hyung, you’re awake,” he breathes. “How are you feeling?”

How is he feeling? Mark thinks back to what he can remember- not being able to sleep, going for class, and perhaps most memorably, Yukhei’s comically panicked, wide-eyed expression as he had fainted.

“I’m feeling much better now,” he responds candidly. “How long have I been out?”

Donghyuck glances at Mark’s clock contemplatively. “Twelve hours?”

Mark’s eyes go wide. “It’s already reaching midnight?” he says, horrified. “I’ve missed two lectures, and I need to do some readings, and-”

“Mark hyung, shut up, will you?” Donghyuck snaps. Mark stops talking immediately. Donghyuck gives him a long look before sighing. “Renjun said you’ve barely been sleeping. It’s really not good for you, you know.”

“You think I don’t know that?” Mark responds frustratedly, feeling tears prick at the corners of his eyes. “You think I haven’t _tried_ to sleep, Donghyuck? I’ve done everything you could think of- hot tea, honey water, meditation, sleeping early, you name it. The only thing that’s ever come _close_ to helping me is-” he stops abruptly, not wanting to say _you._

Donghyuck exhales slowly, tiredly. “You should go back to sleep,” he says.

 _That’s_ all he has to say? “Why have you been ignoring me?” Mark asks, ignoring his statement.

Donghyuck looks at him like a deer in the headlights. “I,” he swallows. “I can’t tell you right now, Mark hyung.” Mark’s heart sinks, but he’s not entirely surprised. “Please, will you get some more rest? You have no idea how terrified I was when Jeno came to me, telling me that Jaemin told him that you’d fucking _passed out_ in class. I felt horrible.”

Mark thinks of pressing the issue further, but takes one look at Donghyuck’s solemn expression and decides against it. “Okay,” he mumbles, sliding back under his covers. “Um, you can leave if you want to. I’ll be fine.” (He probably won’t be, but Donghyuck doesn’t need to know that.)

Donghyuck looks like he wants to say something, but he holds himself back. “I’m not leaving until I’m certain you’re sleeping,” he says, determinedly. And to Mark’s surprise, he lifts the corner of his duvet, slipping into the bed, body pressing against Mark’s side.

“What are you doing?” Mark yelps. Donghyuck doesn’t reply, merely winds an arm around Mark’s shoulders, pulling him in.

“I hope this works,” Donghyuck mutters.

“You hope what works?” Mark asks, but sleep overtakes him before he can hear Donghyuck’s reply. The last thing he remembers is the sensation of Donghyuck’s fingers in his hair again, familiar and steady.

 

The next time Mark is awoken, it feels like it’s only been five minutes since the last time he was awake. There’s a hand shaking him gently, holding onto his shoulder.

“Donghyuck?” he tries saying, but it comes out in a far less coherent jumble of noises instead.

“Yes, hyung,” Donghyuck whispers. “I’m going for work, okay? I hope you recover well. Please take care of yourself.”

“Why are you making it sound like you aren’t going to come back?” Mark slurs. He hasn’t even lifted his head from his pillow.

“Rest well, hyung,” Donghyuck murmurs. There’s a light pressure on his face, like Donghyuck is caressing his cheekbone with the tips of his fingers.

It’s only several hours later that Mark realises that Donghyuck had never answered his question.

 

Renjun, understandably, is furious once he sees Mark awake and alert, and proceeds to give him a scolding so long and detailed that Mark thinks that even his own mother would be surprised to hear it.

“I’m going to give you a _curfew,”_ Renjun says, tone stern. “You’re going to have a bedtime, got it? Clearly, when left to your own devices, you end up doing stupid shit like this and harming your own health.”

Mark rolls his eyes. “Yes, _mom._  Hey, in my defense, at least I’ve been asleep for almost a day now.”

Renjun brightens at that, sending him a small smile. “That’s true,” he admits. He smiles at Mark slyly. “It was Donghyuck, wasn’t it?”

“Um,” Mark says. He chooses not to comment.

“Jaemin mentioned your whole fainting spell thing to Jeno yesterday, and I guess Jeno told Donghyuck. He showed up here out of breath, you know,” Renjun informs him smugly. Mark flushes at the thought of Donghyuck sprinting to his apartment, worried and agitated.

“I wasn’t going to let him in at first, because let’s face it, he’s the reason you were like this in the first place,” Renjun continues. Mark frowns, but he doesn’t deny it. “But he told me that he can help you rest properly, and I had work to do at home anyway…”

“So you abandoned me, basically,” Mark says, amused.

“I guess you could put it like that. So, he stayed here overnight?”

“No, actually,” Mark says. “I think he was going for work?”

“Oh, right, I forgot that he has work at ungodly hours,” Renjun says, more to himself than it is to Mark. Mark feels curiosity spark up in him.

“Hey, where does Donghyuck work, anyway?” he asks casually. “I keep meaning to ask, but I always forget.”

“Oh, he’s a radio DJ, I think,” Renjun replies. “He does a two hour show with this other dude who’s like, real tiny. Jeno told me that he’s like the same height as _me,_ except this guy is like six years older than me…” Renjun trails off, eyes snapping back to focus on Mark’s face. “Anyway, I’m rambling. Why did you want to know about his job?”

Mark’s brain is working overtime, trying to piece together _something_ with the information that he’s been provided with, but he can’t quite place his finger on what exactly it is.

“Just curious, that’s all,” he says. “You’ve been mentioning this Jeno dude a lot recently, by the way. You and Jaemin both.” He watches with unconcealed satisfaction as Renjun’s cheeks turn a dark pink.

“Yeah, well,” Renjun stammers. “I just remembered I have to go home to get my textbooks for my next class, I’ll be off now, hope you take care, hyung!” He makes his way to the door speedily, as Mark tries not to laugh. Before he exits Mark’s apartment, he turns around.

“You should ask Donghyuck about his radio show! I know they do live singing sometimes, and I think you’d be into his voice,” he says, sending Mark a thumbs-up, before he leaves.

Mark freezes. _Live singing, two person show with an older guy that has the voice of an angel, late night…_

Mark makes a decision to stay up that night. He’s got a show to catch.

 

It’s two on the dot when Mark tunes in, this time. He’s never actually listened to the _Sun & Moon _introduction, but it’s pretty straightforward- it starts off with one song, and Taeil begins speaking as the ending notes of said song fade out.

“Good morning! Or night, however you prefer to refer to it,” he says. “I’m your host Moon Taeil, the _Moon_ in _Sun & Moon.” _

“And I’m Haechan, your Full Sun!” Haechan says, sounding cheerful...and _all too familiar_. Mark’s swears his heart stops for a second. He’s fucking stupid, that’s what he is. He’s been listening to Donghyuck speak to him in person _and_ on radio and he still hadn’t been able to tell that they were the _same_ fucking person?

Hold on. His eyes widen with horror as he realises that he’s _told_ Donghyuck that he likes someone, and is planning on confessing to them, over the phone on air. Donghyuck has no way of knowing that the object of Mark’s affections is in fact, Donghyuck himself. And there’s no way Donghyuck hadn’t realised that it had been Mark calling- he’d even said his own name to them.

Hope flares up in his heart, uncontrollable. It’s a long shot, but...what if Donghyuck had been avoiding him because he’d thought that Mark was interested in someone else? That phone call would have been as good as a flat out rejection for him. He ponders for a moment, thinking of what he can do. In his ears, the radio goes _ch-ch-ch-ch-chewing gum_ repeatedly, making him wince. Bubblegum pop is not the most appropriate kind of music for two in the morning, he thinks. The song finishes with a final _chewing gum~,_ and Haechan- well, _Donghyuck-_ begins speaking.

“That was _Chewing Gum-”_ -yeah, Mark had deduced as much- “-by a group called DREAM! Pretty catchy song,” Mark thinks that _catchy_ isn’t exactly the first word he would use if he had to describe that song, but he digresses.

“So, Haechan, do you suppose we should take some listener calls now?” Taeil asks. Mark’s eyes widen.

He’s dialling the number before he even hears Donghyuck begin to reply, having memorised it from before.

“Hello, this is Yuta speaking from NCT Standard FM.”

“Um, hi, it’s Mark again. I don’t know if you remember me-”

“Of course I remember you, Haechan sulked for _so_ fucking long after you called,” Yuta cuts him off abruptly. Mark balks. “Why are you calling again?”

“I want to...clear up some things,” Mark says. “I think this was a misunderstanding.”

“Well, I just want you to know that Haechan’s brother is my roommate, and we both know what school you attend,” Yuta says, voice dripping with faux-sweetness. Mark’s smart enough to recognise the threat concealed within his words. “If Hyuck is _sad_ once you finish talking to him again…” he trails off. Mark swallows.

“Anyway!” Suddenly, Yuta does a complete one-eighty, tone becoming bubbly and pleasant. “Our hosts are free now, so I’ll redirect you to them.”

“...okay,” Mark says, cautiously. “Thank you.”

“Don’t mess it up!” is all Yuta says, before he’s hearing Taeil’s voice.

“Here’s our next listener! Hi, what’s your name?”

“Hi, it’s Mark. I don’t know if you remember, but I called a couple of days back,” Mark says. There are a couple of moments of tense silence, during which Mark seriously contemplates hanging up.

“Well, hello, Mark, we do remember you! It’s nice to hear from you again,” Taeil says cordially. “Any updates on your situation that you talked about last time?”

“Well,” Mark takes a deep breath. “I haven’t been able to confess to this guy yet. But first, can I describe him, and get your opinion on if he sounds like he reciprocates my feelings?”

“...um,” Taeil says. He sighs, sounding defeated. “Sure, of course you can. We’ll do our best to offer our opinions.”

“This guy...I’ve only recently met him,” Mark starts. “He’s kind, sweet, funny, and has a gorgeous voice.” He swallows. “I’ve, uh. I’ve been struggling with insomnia as of late, and his presence calms me down enough to help me fall asleep. But I’m pretty sure he only sees me as a friend- there was once when he kissed me on the cheek, but he never mentioned it again, so I assumed he regretted doing it-”

“-maybe this guy thought _you_ regretted the kiss?” Donghyuck breaks in suddenly, sounding frantic. “Like, maybe he kissed you out of impulse, or something, before he realised that he’s actually kind of out of your league and he shouldn’t have done that.”

Mark feels his entire expression go _soft_ at the words. “Or maybe he doesn’t think this guy is out of his league at all,” he says quietly. “Maybe he thinks this guy is pretty incredible, but he wasn’t able to confess because the guy was avoiding him.”

“Well, perhaps he realises now that it was a mistake and he should have communicated properly with you about it at first,” Donghyuck replies, equally quiet. “He might have thought that you were interested in someone else, or something.”

“I’m not,” Mark says. “I’m only interested in you-I mean, _that guy.”_

The words hang heavily in the air, for a moment. All of a sudden, Taeil begins laughing, effectively ending the silence in the call.

“Well, it sure sounds like the feeling is mutual!” he chuckles, sounding borderline hysterical. “I think that’s all the time we have for your call today, Mark.”

“Of course,” Mark says. “I think I’ll be confessing to him, then.”

“Not if he confesses to you first,” Donghyuck says. At least, that’s what Mark thinks he says. He sounds kind of muffled.

“What was that?” Mark asks.

“Nothing,” Taeil replies. “Absolutely nothing. Anyway, thank you for your call, and I wish you luck!” The line goes dead. Mark collapses against his pillows, feeling a wide grin unfurl on his face. He can’t fall asleep, but honestly, he’s too awake to care.

 

At half past four, there’s an incessant pounding on his door. Mark rolls out of bed with bleary eyes- he had been trying to fall asleep, but it hadn’t really been working out.

“I’m coming!” he calls out, stumbling to the front door. He opens it.

Donghyuck stands in front of him. He takes one look at Mark, and his lips turn downward to form a frown. “Did I wake you?” he asks guiltily. “Sorry, hyung. I’ll come back in the morning.”

“No, Hyuck, it’s okay, I wasn’t sleeping. Just trying to,” Mark reassures him. He steps aside. “Come in, please.” There’s a weird sort of tension between them. It’s not a bad kind of tension, it’s just..weird, and unavoidable.

Donghyuck steps inside, removing his coat as he does so. He’s wearing an oversized white sweater over black jeans that cling to his legs. Angelic wouldn’t even begin to cover the way he looks right now, Mark thinks absently to himself.

“You’re staring, hyung,” Mark looks up, startled, to be met with Donghyuck’s fond gaze. They take a seat on Mark’s couch. Their knees are touching. Mark tries not to be too aware of it.

“So, you listen to my radio show?”

“Yeah, I stumbled across it the day before we met for the first time, actually,” Mark says. “You were doing a solo show. Your voice soothed me, calmed me down. It was just an added bonus that it’s also probably the most beautiful voice I’ve ever heard.”

His words cause Donghyuck to duck his head shyly, a blush rising high on his cheeks. God, Mark wants to kiss him _so_ badly.

“Why did you call and confess about liking someone on air, though? Why didn’t you tell me in person?”

“You see, the thing is,” Mark clears his throat. “I kind of. Didn’t know that you and Haechan were the same person?”

“You what,” Donghyuck says, incredulity coating his words. _“How?_ We have the _same voice.”_

“I don’t know, I just didn’t realise until Renjun happened to mention that you worked as a radio DJ earlier today,” Mark says. “I’m dumb, okay, I have like one working braincell or whatever the kids call it these days. You can make fun of me if you want. I would do it if I were you.”

“I don’t think I want to do that.”

“Do what? Make fun of me?” Mark turns to Donghyuck, to see the younger boy already facing him, staring at him with a newfound intensity in his eyes.

“I think I’d rather kiss you instead,” Donghyuck says, voice hushed. He leans forward, slowly enough that Mark could back out if he wanted to.

Mark doesn’t budge.

Their lips connect slowly. Donghyuck scoots forward on the couch, minimising the space between their bodies. His hands tangle in Mark’s hair, a feeling so new yet so familiar at the same time. Mark wraps his arms around Donghyuck’s waist, savouring the feeling of the younger boy in his arms. Donghyuck lets out the tiniest of whimpers, sparking _something_ within Mark, making him pull the younger onto his lap.

They part for air at the same time, chests heaving, faces flushed. Donghyuck looks down at Mark’s face and leans down, pressing a chaste kiss to his forehead.

“I’ve wanted to do that for a while now,” Donghyuck says.

“Me too,” Mark replies. “When you kissed me on the bus, I thought...well, never mind.”

Donghyuck winces. “I’m sorry for not bringing it up afterwards,” he apologises. His fingers move down and find Mark’s, their palms pressing together as they hold hands. “We’d only just met, and I didn’t want to damage our friendship.”

Mark smiles wistfully.

“At least we have each other now,” he says. “Hey, before I forget- what’s with the fake name? Haechan?”

Donghyuck laughs. “It was a nickname given to me by my Taeil hyung,” he says, smiling faintly. “He’s dating my brother- that’s how I met him. He’s the one who helped me get the radio position, actually. He said that if we were to be co-hosts, our names should match. And _Sun & Moon _was born.”

“That’s pretty cute,” Mark says. “And you _are_ a ray of sunshine, so.”

“If you’re going to be this greasy all the time, Mark Lee, I think we should end this relationship now,” Donghyuck says primly.

Mark grins. “Relationship?”

Donghyuck rolls his eyes. “Yes, relationship,” he pauses, suddenly looking a little unsure. “Unless you don’t want to, of course.”

Mark doesn’t answer- he doesn’t need to. All he does is lean up and seals the deal- quite literally, with his lips.

 

“It’s now ten to four, so you know what time it is!” Donghyuck crows into his microphone. Mark’s listening to _Sun & Moon _ again, except that instead of listening to it on his phone, he’s sitting in the studio instead, watching Taeil and Donghyuck talk. (Taeil really _had_ been as short as Renjun had said.) And rather than being awake only because he can’t sleep, he’s awake of his own volition, choosing to stay up for the show for one very special reason.

_'LIVE MUSIC ON SUN & MOON!'_

Taeil and Donghyuck are standing with microphones in front of them. There’s a stool behind them. Mark smiles, grabs his guitar, and makes his way over.

“We’re singing another original composition today,” Taeil says. “It’s got quite the fitting title for this show- _Sun & Moon!” _

“It wasn’t written by either of us, which is a first for us,” Donghyuck says. He turns around, sending Mark a small smile. “It was actually written by someone pretty special to me.”

Mark ignores the blush in his cheeks and waits for Taeil to give him the signal to start strumming. Once Taeil sends him a thumbs-up, he lets his fingers travel over the strings, letting them play the melody he’s become intimately accustomed to over the past few weeks, from the process of writing lyrics to composing the tune, to hearing Donghyuck sing it for the first time.

Taeil starts the song, flawlessly as usual. His voice echoes throughout the room, sending shivers down Mark’s spine. But it’s nothing compared to what happens to his insides once Donghyuck starts singing. His boyfriend’s voice is as beautiful as it had been the first time Mark had listened to it, back when he had been covering that SHINee song. His vocals are clear and lilting, and him and Taeil carry the song well until it ends, harmonising as they finish. _You and I, you and I, you and I..._

Mark sets his guitar down gently, listening as Taeil and Donghyuck wrap up the show. The moment they go off air, Donghyuck turns around, bounding over to him and pressing a kiss to his cheek.

“It’s a really good song, Mark,” Taeil praises. “Let me know if you need any help with producing music- I know a few people who I think would really like you.”

“Really? Thanks, hyung,” Mark smiles widely. Taeil ruffles his hair, and Donghyuck’s, before taking his leave.

“Ready to head back?” Donghyuck asks. He grabs Mark’s hand in his own.

“Are you staying over at mine?”

“Only to help you fall asleep, you gigantic baby,” Donghyuck mock-scoffs.

“So you don’t want to stay over for anything more than that?” Mark pretends to look affronted. “Here I was, thinking we could make out until we got tired, but I guess if you don’t want to do that…” Donghyuck cuffs the back of his head playfully, and they put their coats on, beginning their walk to the bus stop. They get on the bus, number 156, just like they had way back when they hadn’t even known each other properly yet. They claim two seats at the back of the bus, huddling next to each other as they watch the streetlights hurtle by.

Donghyuck lifts his arm, wrapping it around Mark’s shoulders. “We have a little while to go on this bus,” he murmurs. Mark rests his head on Donghyuck’s shoulder. “You should catch some sleep.”

Mark doesn’t protest. Smiling sleepily at Donghyuck, he closes his eyes.

He falls asleep instantly.

**Author's Note:**

> come talk to me about nct on my [tumblr](http://suhcity.tumblr.com)!
> 
> comments/kudos are LOVE! thank you for reading and i hope you enjoyed :) <3


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